We all have that one IT friend or at least an acquaintance that we go to for help when our computers aren’t working. Even if it’s not in their competence field, because for non-IT people, they seem to be the same and know everything that there is with computers both on the inside and the outside.
They probably don’t appreciate that we bug them with problems that they were not trained to fix, so they need a place to vent. A perfect space for that is Reddit and especially when someone asks you for it. Reddit user NetworkMachineBroke was that someone and asked, “IT workers, what is the most ridiculous 'You're IT, you have to fix this' request you've received?” And the answers were quite obviously ridiculous even for people who don’t work in IT.
More info: Reddit
#1One of my first jobs (was in the 90s ) i was senior IT admin for a medium-sized company, and on my day off, the CEO called, I had to get in cause the mail wasn't working and also the banking software didn't work
This CEO was primarily responsible for the financial department so especially this last part was hurting him.
When I came in, said CEO was really flaming, basically burning the entire IT department (of 3 ppl ) as being incompetent, overpaid f**kups. And all the loss of business revenue should come out of our pockets etc. etc.
So during this lovely tirade, I come in, and in a few seconds I realize we have a problem with the internet connection. Keep in mind, these were the 90s, so we had a dual ISDN connection and a dial-up modem connected to it. I run a few tests, and instead of the common modem sounds, i hear some low res voice on the line. I connect a regular phone to it, listen to it, and then gave it to the CEO saying: "it's for you"
After that, the CEO said nothing, and used his own mobile to manage the finances.
What did the ISDN Phone say? "Due to NOT PAYING YOU BLOODY BILL, this line is disconnected. If You want to reinstate this service you have to pay xx + admin costs etc. etc. "
I went home after that, with a very big grin, and started looking for another job.
Image credits: damusic2me
#2Lady called to report her monitor wasn’t working. After troubleshooting and asking her multiple times if everything was plugged in she finally pipes up that the monitor “doesn’t have the light on.” The monitor wasn’t plugged in and she wanted me to wake a guy up at 3am to do it because she was dressed to nicely to do it herself because she was preparing for a meeting at 6am. Told her to do it herself because I was not about to wake up the on call for that. She complained to our director and he literally laughed at her and her reasoning for wanting the on call sent out and she is now banned from calling in.
Image credits: theSQUINTYazn
#3I work in web development/maintenance.
I got a call from a client who was absolutely livid when I told her that she could not take the hyperlinked text from her webpage, transfer it over to their print ad, and still have it function like a link.
Image credits: Hysterical_Realist
#4Drove for 2 hours to replace a touchscreen monitor that had stopped responding; turns out they were wearing gloves.
We used to log these type of callouts as ID-10-T errors
Image credits: soiledpantsforsale
#5The power went out in our building and the owner of the company wanted to know what we were doing to get the computers up.
Image credits: brianh71
#6I was a remote tech and had a woman call me and wanted me to drive 6+ hours to her facility to turn on her computer, because hitting the power button was 'not her job'.
Image credits: CommodoreFiftyFour
#7Old story: Back in the early 90s all of Alaska's comm. was via satellite. We would get notices from our providers when a solar storm was going to slow down our through-put. I went upstairs to our Finance and Accounting chief to tell her the nightly processes might be late due to the storm. Her response was "You're IT just fix it!" Never let her forget that she saw me as a god.
Image credits: AKShoto
#8Not me, and not the guy I knew, but someone he knew, a story from many years ago:
This other fellow is a photocopier serviceman. He gets a call from one of their clients about their photocopier not working. He goes through the short list with the person on the phone, including "It's plugged in, right?" The client assures him everything else is fine, so he grabs his stuff and heads to the client site.
First thing he looks at when he gets to the copier is the power cord. Sure enough, it's in the socket but not properly seated, so no juice. So with the client there, he stands over the copier in the right spot, lays his hands on the top of the copier, and begins chanting - as he reaches the crescendo, out of sight of the client, he lifts his leg up and kicks the plug into the socket fully, and the copier comes to life.
On the worksheet, in the area where he's supposed to describe what actions he took, he simply writes "I HEALED IT" and has the client sign in.
Image credits: The_Ombudsman
#9A couple simple ones.
I got called into repair a broken printer, the guy was pretty livid as he was trying to print in a hurry. Turns out it ran out of paper...
Even worse I had my boss lose his s**t on me that his computer didn't work and made the comment that "nothing ever works around here" (hinting that I failed at my job). I went into his office and found that he didn't turn it on.... I pushed the power button and all I got was an "oh".
IT support has to be one of the worst jobs. Stupid a** people, and anytime something like a mouse battery dies your a POS.
Image credits: TheOrionNebula
#10Got a call the scanner in HR was broken. Thought to myself, we dont have a scanner in HR. Go the the office, the lady has word open and is holding a document to the screen hitting enter repeatedly.
I thought no one would believe me, so I brought about 5 other techs along to corroborate.
Image credits: makeitrain9789
#11Vague tickets that give no clue as to what's wrong beyond "computer broke lol". Then you ring them up asking them to fill it in properly, and they get annoyed, "I thought you guys knew what you're doing".
Or when the Karens at work drop off their personal laptops or phones, and expect us to fix it. That's not what we're here for.
Image credits: D-Rez
#12Our IT helpdesk (before it was renamed the support desk) eventually ended up keeping fluorescent tubes and whiteboard markers in stock because people would send complaints to the CEO that we were refusing to help when we asked them to contact the office manager for these things.
The flipside is that the CEO eventually created a new email address for people to send complaints directly to him. Very few people knew that this special CEO complaints email address actually got forwarded to the office manager.
People have the capacity for such unimaginable greatness, and such hard to believe stupidity. I was personally once reported for sabotaging a specific secretary by refusing to fix her printer. It was printing garbage. Turns out she installed an Epson colour printer driver (from the disk that came with her friends new colour printer) on her (Win95) computer so that her mono HP deskjet printer would also print colour. She reported me the third time I uninstalled the bad driver and asked her not to do it again.
Image credits: AlsoNotTheMamma
#13I was called to fix a point of sale issue for a small coffee shop. The computer was fine. The wall outlet tested negative for power. The owner asked how long till I could fix it. After explaining that she needs an electrician, she started screaming at me and demanding that I fix it because it is my job. After weeks of receiving phone calls from her screaming and vulgar emails being sent, we came by, took the computer system back and canceled her contract.
Image credits: [deleted]
#14Once had a person call in to the IT desk because the soda machine stole their money.
Image credits: Estella_Osoka
#15I was asked to fix a cabinet once.
I don't mean like a server rack or anything, I mean a literal wooden cabinet with shelves and stuff.
I was once also asked to fix an old oscilloscope that was out of warranty. It was running embedded Windows so I could at least sort of see their thought process on that one, but it was still a no.
Image credits: UltraChip
#16I'll start. One time somebody at a company asked me "Why isn't the microwave working? You're in IT after all! Fix it!"
I thought they were joking, but after a bit of deliberation, they were either serious or very committed to the role.
Image credits: NetworkMachineBroke
#17I was working as a developer at a Navy contract. One morning, a Navy Captain walked up to my desk, "You're Roman?"
"Yes, sir! How can I help you?"
"I got a virus in my email, so I forwarded it to you."
"But.... but, why?"
"Well, I didn't want it in my inbox."
"But... but... ..."
"Was it supposed to go to somebody else?"
"You *could* have deleted it or notified the IT guys across the hall who deal with that type of stuff... sir."
"Well... you're IT, right?"
Image credits: roman_fyseek
#18Finally, i get to tell my Singing computer story.
I worked IT Help desk for the Air-force for a short time. I get a call one day from a woman, telling me her computer was singing to her, baffled and somewhat quick witted i asked the women "Can you put the computer on the phone for me?"
Sure enough I'm hearing the POST beep being repeated over and over again, So i ask I her "Is there anything covering your keyboard?"
I hear the flop of a book hit the desk, followed by the windows welcome screen sound. At this point i just hung up the phone.
Image credits: Digitaljehw
#19Not necessarily an IT worker but a computer scientist (a lot of people get those confused) but one time I was at my sister’s house and she needed help getting her printer connected so she ask me “You know how to do this help me” and I tried to do it because it was a simple google search to fix this but she is breathing down my neck because I’m not getting this solved at the speed she wants me to get it done. She then drops a “Didn’t you go to school for this” on me and I respond with “No I make software that sometimes works”.
Moral of the story: If you are an IT worker(or a computer scientist), keep that to yourself.
Image credits: MangosAreForLove
#20My dad used to work in software development. One of his coworkers had to call IT because his computer wasn’t turning on. Turns out his power strip was plugged into itself. He never lived that one down
Image credits: fabdancer95
#21I'm an application architect for medical record software. My primary users (I REFUSE to call them customers) are physicians and nurses in a clinic setting.
There's one specific doctor who will call and give a very vague description to the helpdesk. She refuses to do a shadow session, refuses to let us get screenshots, and the person from the helpdesk isn't an application expert so they're trying to write down her issue and she's using the wrong words.
By the time we usually figure out her issue, we could have resolved it in half the time if she just would have taken 2 minutes to speak with us.
Image credits: EtherBoo
#22I worked for an online college and a student wanted me to change his username. It was goatbugger
Image credits: fatherjimbo
#23Someone refused to believe that computers need power and won’t work in a black out.
Image credits: Lord_of_Furries
#24Got a call to to remove a plug on a radio and push the wire through a small vent in the cabinet because the wire was "unsightly."
I did this while 15 executives watched. None of them knew how to change a plug, and had never even seen the inside of one; but because it had a wire it was ITs responsibility.
Image credits: dietderpsy
#25Years ago I worked for a rather large ISP as a tech lead. A residential DSL customer called in demanding to speak to a supervisor because his internet was down and he was going to miss out on some multi-million dollar deal of he couldn't get on the internet. He kept yelling at me throughout the call and demanded I fix it immediately. While troubleshooting the issue I could see that I couldn't reach the DSLAM his connection ran through. I advised him I would have to reach out to a dispatch center to have a tech go take a look at it. At some point he informed me that on his way home he saw that a vehicle had run off the road into one of our boxes and it had caught fire. He still said he was planning on suing our company if he wasn't able to be online to make this supposed deal of his. I passive aggressively suggested he go to a Starbucks and wished him well with the lawsuit.
Image credits: Valaris
#26I've somehow become the 'Apple Guy' at my work. We recently received a batch of brand new iPad Pros and within a week, I received a repair request due to a screen malfunctioning.
Turns out by screen malfunctioning they meant completely destroyed. Shattered. Like it had been continuously hit with a hammer.
Lady is giving vague explanations about what happened, talking about how it might have fallen off her desk...onto the carpeted floor.
But apparently this is something I can fix? She needed it for a meeting that afternoon. I had to explain that this isn't something we can fix, that I'll need to go through Apple for a replacement device. Shocking news, apparently
Image credits: Vucifer
#27Worked for a small bank (two IT staff including me)... drove 60 miles out to a branch to fix an issue and while I was used to getting hit with a million saved up "while you're here" issues I was not prepared for "the toilet is acting weird, can you look at it while you're here?"
Image credits: ipsok
#28Our office had a new "catering kitchen" for executive functions. One of the first events it was used for was a fundraiser breakfast put on by the staff for some reason or another. They had to skip the hot food because they couldn't get the stove to turn on. After that, nobody used the stove because everyone thought it didn't work.
One day, it became an IT problem because the stove top was broken and they wanted someone to fix it, and, well, it uses electricity and has LEDs, so it must be IT, right? I figured out the problem. there was nothing wrong with the stove, other than it was an induction stove and they had non-ferrous cookware, which will not work with induction stoves.
Image credits: DrunkenGolfer
#29My favorite is... when our internet service goes out. Usually when this happens, there is a fiber or cable line down or our ISP is doing general maintenance. I try to explain to baby-boomer co-workers that my responsibility ends outside of our Local Area Network and it's our ISP's duty to repair whatever is causing the outage. No matter how many times I try to explain... they don't listen, it's my fault and I'm a lazy, piece-of-do-nothing s**t and the reason they can't get their precious internet and email.
Image credits: NonHipster72
#30I had a lady who brought her laptop in for a simple software repair. I fixed it and get it back to her. She calls me directly two days later and is absolutely irate that her camera isn't working. I explained to her that I never touched her camera but if she wanted to come back in I would gladly take a look. She didn't want that, even though my location is all walk up and no remote support she absolutely wanted me to "remote in and figure it out because it was working before you (I) worked on it". I put her on hold and as I was looking up her machine name I remembered she had electrical tape over her camera so I picked up the phone and said "I seem to recall tape over the camera. Is that still there?" She promptly hung up.
#311-CEO called in and said “my cupholder is broken can you get me another one?” He used the CD Tray as a cup holder.
2-Internet was down throughout the country due to Bandwidth cable getting cut during a heavy storm - CEO: “You're IT, if you don't fix the internet I'll fire you and find someone who will., it took the head of IT calling the ISP, put em on loud speaker in front of the CEO and say that the cables been cut off and that it is a national problem.
Image credits: Makes_Sence
#32Barring the woman that threw a floppy disk at my chest because "she put the internet on it and when she got home it didn't work"?
As a UK based enterprise Head of IT with no experience of heavy machinery I was once told I'd be fixing a three axis milling machine because it was controlled by a vintage PC. The entire thing was in German too. Yeah, I managed it.
#33Got requested to install those under desk keyboard trays for all the employees in a department a few years back. Had a good laugh and told them where to find the power drill.
Image credits: blasted_heath
#34Assembling the office furniture is a good use of IT time.
Image credits: TheNegotiator12
#35Nothing was broke but I got a request into the IT Helpdesk once from an employee asking where he could get a pig carcass.
Image credits: acretion
#36Work in networks and used to share an office with people who just basically took situation reports. So when they were out of the office for lunch or called in sick we'd answer their phones and take notes for when they got back out next shift came in.
So our guy calls out one night and I take a call that some generator somewhere went out. Ok cool write it in the log and pass it on for the next shift. Then boss ends up questioning me on what I did about the generator. Like what do you expect me to do, ping it? Would you like me to get it's Mac address? It literally has nothing to do with my job.
Image credits: cookiebasket2
#37Had a call in the middle of the night from India asking me if I was the administrator for a particular piece of software. I was not. No idea how he got my number. Must have read it off an email chain or something.
#38Smaller company. 100 people. Toilet had motion flush sensor. Battery died. Since it's electronic, it made its way to IT helpdesk.
#39After two lawyers struggled trying themselves to get a printer going for over an hour I did a call out on a public holiday in lockdown to go unplug the USB cable from the fax port and into where it's supposed to be.
Apparently it had been working the way I found it for months. No it did not have WiFi.
#40I got asked to fix a coffee pot. Yes you read that correctly.
#41One place I worked it was pretty much if it got electricity, it was IT's issue. We had to fix the water fountain that wouldn't stop running. We had to fix the coffee machine.
Image credits: TheDeadGunslinger
#42Many years ago I worked level 1 tech support for a major tech company. I took a call from a sales rep that was going to be giving a presentation in one of our conference rooms. She needed help setting up her multiple display set up, so I answered her questions and she seemed generally happy with the way things were going. At the end she asked for a quad monitor bracket/stand for her presentation. I said that her best would be to run by one of our support depots and see if they have one she can use but otherwise she'd need to order one. She asked how long it would take and I suggested maybe a few days.
Things rapidly went downhill from there.
She wanted it now. I said that maybe running by the depot would be a better option, then. She said this was terrible support and why couldn't I just send her one? This confused me a bit but I pressed on trying to convince her to try trying the local depot and on the side reached out to a buddy of mine that worked over there to see if he had one available. She became furious and demanded that I email her one.